I'm falling head over heels for a guy I can't have...

I think the title says it all... Feelings suck.

I'm so close guys...

So.. I am happy to say that I graduate May 25th... which is..  NOT THAT FAR AWAYY! I am literally so excited.. but yet I am also kinda sad.. I know these next few weeks are going to fly.by.. being that we have Spring break.. Senior skip day.. Senior camp out day.. UGH I can't believe all my hard work is finally paying off... 12 long years finally well almost over with.. & then .. It's off to college for me for the next four years ! :) I actually just got my stuff for graduation day Friday so of course I was super emotional! lol.


Then after graduation is SENIOR WEEK! Which will be fun.. Right now I'm just worried about getting through the third quarter of school.. Always the hardest & the quarter that takes forever to pass by... So many tests, projects, quizzes due... 

When is you guys graduation date that is.. if you're a senior?

What's something you will miss about high school! COMMENT BELOW!

Yuck.. love. Boys have cooties... Did we forget that ladies?

So.. Valentines Day is about three days away & I couldn't be more thrilled!!

Did you catch on to my sarcasm there? lol..

Valentines Day is really nothing special for me.. in fact I will be spending it at home watching Gossip Girl & maybe cleaning my house. I've never really been a big fan of you know the HUGE teddy bears & all the roses & chocolate. My thing is.. You really want to show me you appreciate me? Let's just hang out .. have a movie night.. eat junk food.. & talk about random stuff all night. You don't have to spend wads of money to show a girl you care.. It's the simple things that mean the most. Unfortunately, like I said I'm spending Valentines Day with no one.. just like it's been the past.. oh I don't know 17 years? haha. There's really only one guy that comes to mind.. but you know things don't always work as planned & you don't always get what you want. All that matters is he's happy! Right? :)

So to all you .. lovey dovey teenagers & couples in general out there.. I hope you all have a GREAT Valentines Day! Show your significant other how much they mean to you! Don't let the opportunity pass to tell them how much they mean to you because time is so priceless.. 

But really though.. boys have cooties.

Ew.

Just the typical ranting post. lol

I've come to the conclusion that .. some things are just not meant to work out.. I've spent my whole life trying to please people and make sure they're okay but you know what.. I haven't even stopped a single second to make sure I was okay. It's like I've been running an endless amount of miles fixing or helping to mend patches in peoples lives that aren't necessarily the best but I haven't stopped to catch my breath. & to be honest I've gotten to the point where.. I can't keep running anymore. I can't help others and give others advice when I can't even take my own advice.. A lot of stuff has been on my mind the past couple of days.. I started back talking to an old friend of mine.. well for the second time! Just as friends though.. ! Well way back when I had the biggest crush on this person.. but I don't know .. thing's changed. & I feel so stupid because.. I'm the type of girl that doesn't admit how she feels .. I've always done that & I don't know why.. I like someone but I have a chance with them I always second guess myself and tell the person I don't like them.. but yet when I see they have moved on & are happy I get super jealous..I mean.. does that mean I still have feelings toward that person?

SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE. lol 

I'm tired of turning people away .. 

On a more positive note though.. I am headed toward the Bahamas in TWO DAYS! Lot's of pictures to come! Super excited to be taking my third cruise! It's truly a memory I will never forget! Oh! & won't forget all the amazing food either <3 lol.. how has everyone been? Any good New Years Resolutions...? Let me hear em!

Comment below!

I'm back.. alright let's talk...

HEY GUYS! So.. I know you all are probably wondering where I have been.. considering it's been a couple of months since I last posted. Well, senior year has taken a toll on me! I have so much studying and homework and activities outside of school for school that it is just.. woah. A bit overwhelming! Haha but I wouldn't change it for a thing I love being a busy bee! I thought I would just put up a post not anything to interesting or exciting and let you guys know I'm still here. I know I haven't been as active as I should be but still.. I care a lot about this blog and continue to put it to good use!

So today I wanted to bring up and issue that has been heavily debated worldwide and that's suicidal thoughts/depression. If anything had to upset me or hurt me it would be to see how many teenagers battle such horrible things. I am here to not only make you laugh on this blog but to be a friend if that's the case. If you have ever been depressed/had suicidal thoughts or if you currently are just know that I am here for you. Whether it be two in the morning.. four in the afternoon.. it doesn't matter! I will try to get back to you as soon as possible! I hope that by me writing this you get some insight as to just how precious and valuable your life is. Don't just throw it all away.. God has a purpose for you!! Let Him work wonders.. Let Him take you far in life.. more importantly let Him love.you. I pray for you.. I pray things will get better with time.. I pray that you find the courage and strength to confide in someone and let them be there to help you and support you! Please understand how valuable your life is.. there will never be another you! Never.. and you're so unique, God made you special.. one of a kind.. I know sometimes it may feel like you've hit rock bottom but trust me.. You will make it through! You're strong.. you can turn your life upside down and around.. you can strive to make things better! All it takes its.. a little effort. That's it.. I believe in every single one of you.. that no matter what life throws at you.. you won't let it knock you off your feet. Please don't hesitate to message me if you're going through a tough time! 

Lately I've been feeling bleh...

You know those days when you just feel bleh..? Yea that's totally me right now. Boys have got me all twisted in my feelings. Friends have me wondering if I even have any friends.. It's just a mess to say the least! At least I have God and my family though! Oh and 93.3 on the radio <3 I think I've become somewhat obsessed with this radio station. I don't know.. Oh a plus to this weekend is that it's actually been pretty.. GREAT! I've been pretty busy! Friday I went to a few haunted houses and let me just say they were AMAZINGG! Only down side was that... It was FREEZING.. from the time I stepped out of the car until the time I got back into the car I was shivering lol. We went to two places they both were equally good! Was very impressed with them both! & of course afterwards we had to stop by waffle house and eat something I mean come on.. what better thing to do at three in the morning! lol.. Yesterday I went to the movies to see the new Goosebumps movie.. It was so so good! I highly recommend that you go see it if you haven't already! Don't say no because you're a teen or anything like that because I'm currently seventeen and I LOVED it ! :) Now I'm just chilling and relaxing on this peaceful Sunday! Because.. Sadly, it's back to school tomorrow! I already have senior fever and it's not even the first of the year.. Still can't process the thought of me graduating in a few short months.. These couple of months are going to FLY BY!

Why is it...

Why is it that guys can flirt all day long but when you actually want something serious it's such a big deal. I've had enough flirting to last a life time! I want someone who I can trust... ... and just simply be.happy. Oh.. & I have come to the conclusion that most guys don't want an individual who is kind.. and has a great personality. They want someone with the most money.. and the greatest body. They could care less about how someone truly is within. & that my friends is why relationships don't normally work out. They go in all sorts of different directions and at the end of the day it's usually the girl that get's hurt! Maybe she got cheated on.. or lied to.. is there any decent guys still in this world? I mean.. not to put down all guys because I have some friends who are very nice and respectful but the majority is what I'm concerned about.

Is this real life..

guys... today I went outside to check the mail box for like the 500th time these past two weeks & I finally got my acceptance letter! I'm going to college! & to make it even better it's the college I've dreamed of going to. Every time I would ride past it i'd be just so amazed at how beautiful the campus was! Now.. next fall I will get to call it my home away from home! I literally was crying today.. No. Joke.

I think it's so amazing how God works.. He blessed me with this opportunity...

He just works in amazing mysterious ways!

Every where I went after that today I blared my Christian playlist from the internet and basically just jammed out !

I literally felt so emotional today knowing that things are finally sinking in and setting into place..

A huge hardship has been lifted off my shoulders.. I don't have to worry about what i'm going to do after highschool or if i'm going to be able to get into college.. I'm so happy and content with the choice I made..

I feel that this University will welcome me with open arms and their love for God is never ending and that make's me love it 10x more! I can't wait to see where this journey takes me !

I'm so emotional tonight..

I need to start living my life for God. Not for me.. I need to put him first in everything I do. I want to be closer to him. I don't want to just come to him when i'm in need of help but I want to be there to tell him how my day was or something exciting that happened. I've gotten in the habit of not even saying thanks or praying some nights. That seems so selfish of me... As of yesterday I really just thought about it and I want my relationship with God to be my main priority. I'm so tired of feeling like I have no friends or no one I can come to when I have someone who has always been there for me .. Pouring out their unconditional love to me.. Waiting for me to give them a chance.

I haven't been living my life for God. I've been so selfish and worried about me. Worried about what others think.. being caught up in liking guys and getting so hurt and dragged down..

What I need is His light to shine on me because He knows best.. I just have to let him into my life. I can't keep shutting Him out. He welcomes me with open arms and at times I'm just so self-centered that I forget to talk to him or say thanks.

This last year has not been easy.. I've sometimes questioned why God would let things happen.. Why did He have to do it.. Why now.. Why to me..? I just didn't understand it. At all.. I was angry and didn't know what to say or think... But after awhile I realized that I had forgotten something.. That God will NEVER put you through something you can't handle.. It may be tough..but the challenges we face here on earth cannot compare to the glory of Heaven.. The life we live here on earth.. It's temporary so that's why it's important you live for God.

A goal of mine for this year...?

Be a witness to someone..

I want to tell them about the never-ending love God has for them. How much he loves them and cares for them.. How He stands their willingly with open arms.. 

Getting old ~ !

Happyyyyyyyy... birthday to me! Happy birthday to meeeee!



Well.. not yet anyways! 


Yet another birthday is fixing to roll around, and I cannot believe it.. Soon I will be old.. D:


But! My birthday is Thursday and I'm pretty excited ! I would love it if you guys could send me some letters through email for my birthday for me to read! It would for sure make my day! I love talking to you guys.. So why not send me a 'Happy Birthday Letter' ?


OH! Also.. I've recently put together another blog as well! Exciting I know..

It's my photography blog.. Will be used to store all my photos I take when I go on trips.. Maybe you'd like to check it out sometime ! Just lemme' know! :)



Thanks guys!

P.S. I know my blogging schedule is kinda off.. So I'm going to try & blog EVERY Tuesday & Thursday! :) 

Senior Year Is Literally RIGHT Around The Corner

So the closer Senior year gets the more and more I want to create a "bucket list" one just specifically for Senior Year! So.. Why not write it here that way I can look back later and remember all the crazy things I wanted to do!


1. CHANGE SOMEONES LIFE.

2. Be a witness to someone

3. Go cliff diving

4. Visit New York

5.Participate in a color run

6.Write a message in a bottle and send it

7. Visit the love lock bridge

8. Fall in love

9. Go on a mission trip

10. WINTER-JAM <3

11. Become friends with someone I normally wouldn't 

12. Make all A's

13. Ride a loop roller-coaster

14. Go to a drive-in movie

15. Go on a road trip

16. Sit on a roof and watch the stars/sunset


Whats some things you have on your bucket-list? Comment below ! :)

Forgiveness is tough.. but holding a grudge is worse.

So... when you think of the word forgiveness what comes to mind? 


These past few days i've really been taking my life and consideration & just reflecting back on everything that has happened of the years. One thing I've always had trouble with is forgiveness... whether it be something stupid and pointless or something HUGE.


I think now more than ever I need to be forgiving others.. I've come to a point in my life where.. friends have turned into the unknown.. Those who said they would always be there for me and never leave me side.. 

Yea they left..

Those who promised to stay through thick and thin..

They left tooo..

It really saddens me that I've had to lose so many friends along the way but time changes everything.. But, the closer I become to God the more I realize I need to be forgiving others.. Even those who have done me wrong. Because, in all reality how can we expect God to forgive us for all our sins if I can't even forgive a single person for a careless mistake..

I'm not at the point where I can say I forgive you to the person face to face so why not write & vent here?

I forgive those who have ever bullied me or others.
I forgive those who have left my side
I forgive those who doubted me even for a second at my lowest points.
I forgive those who have done me wrong & lied to me whether it be for my own good or theirs.
I forgive those who have ever hurt me.

Is it easier to forgive or forget? Comment your opinions below!

My life as of now.. well the majority of it ! lol

You know.. I've never been one to complain about being out of school.. but as of right now. I am more than ready for senior year to begin! Friday I get to go in and take my senior yearbook photo.. I am excited yet nervous. Because let's face it.. my smile is.. lets just say.. not the best. That's probably one of my top insecurities. Maybe I will just do one of my funny gestures and stick out my tounge lol. Senior year has lots instore for me.. Student council.. Teacher Cadet.. Yearbook staff.. and not to mention some honors classes I have.. I have to start applying for scholarships.. Actually decided what career I want to pursue.. Visit different colleges.. SOOO.MUCHHH. omg. I'm kinda scared about going to live on campus and being away from my family.. I'm sort of a home body if you couldn't already tell.. Lol... But as of right now things seem to be going good! I actually had a lot of fun today my dad gave my brother a hair cut.. & I got to help! Scary I know... lol but I think he likes it.. and hey! Saves us a couple bucks. Maybe I will cut hair for a living.. lol na. I'd probably make someone bald D: Relationship wise.. I'm still single.. lol just like I was when I created this blog. Umm.. I do like this guy but I feel things wouldn't work out for certain reasons... 

I have a question for you guys..

If you really like someone and you are apart of one religion but they don't necessarily agree.. what do you do? would the relationship work out?

Comment your opinions below! I'd LOVE to hear from you guys!! :)

Spring breakin' it! We are truly blessed..

As you guys already know i've been off for quite some time now! Things have been so hectic and crazy that I haven't really had much time at all to blog! I've been busy registering for my SENIOR classes next year! I am so so sooo excited.. but at the same time nervous and scared because that means i'm one step closer to college! So today I just wanted to talk about the true meaning of Easter... what would you say if I asked what is the true meaning of Easter? As a kid I always was so excited to wake up and see if the Easter bunny had come... and I was super excited for the Easter egg hunts! I agree all that is fun but what we should really be thinking about is Jesus! I know I know... I have my opinion and you have yours.. If you don't believe or you're not a christian then.. so be it! I'm here to speak to those who do believe and have a burning love and passion for Christ! Or those who want to be christian but don't know anyone really to talk to.. I'm here to tell you that I am here to talk if you want! As long as you're respectful and nice to me I will do the same in return! Have questions? I may be able to answer them.. If not I can ask someone who might or search around and find something! I don't know everything but I am willing to talk to any of you if needed! Comment below and get in touch with me, I will respond in no time! So.. true meaning of Easter, it all starts with Jesus and the suffering he went through to save our sins, I believe and know for a fact in my heart that Jesus Christ died on the cross for not only me but for you ... and you... and you.. and all of you! This weekend is for sure something.. within the span of three days Jesus died and rose from the dead. When I think about this .. this is what I say... how is it that someone who had never met me in person but only knew of me could risk their lives for me and suffer for me? It shows me just how much Jesus cares for me and loves me! He didn't have to do that... but he did it willingly! There is no greater love than that! If we think about it we are truly blessed... to have someone care so much for us.. Many question how Christians know that the bible is real and that Jesus is real.. and all this. My only answer for them is .. I walk by faith, that even when I cannot see Jesus I know he is there with me and there for me! Again... If any of you would like someone to talk to i'd be more than happy to! I'm not saying you have to! You have your own opinions but just if ya want to!:) God bless..! <3 

Reaching out doesn't mean your weak .. it makes you stronger !

As an individual who's being bullied or feeling alone: ..you could scream from the mountain tops and never be heard.You could wear the brightest clothing yet still.. never be recognized. You could have the most soothing and calming voice yet never be heard or listened to.. There are thousands of teens who feel this way every.single.day. Those who feel like..they don't matter or no one would ever care about them.. There's those who get bullied every single day whether it be at school or a matter of fact anywhere in public. It breaks my heart to see so many individuals taking their own lives because they feel they don't have another way out.. I feel sorry for those who cut to numb the pain only if it does last for a few quick seconds... I'm here to tell each and every one of you.. Those who feel lonely .. hurt.. betrayed..I am here for you ! I will make time to talk to you if you're hurting! Don't ever think for a second that no one cares about you because I do! Shoot me an email.. comment below.. there's plenty of ways you can get in contact with me! Don't feel ashamed to ask for help.. no I don't know everything or know all the answers but I am willing to listen and be a shoulder to cry on! It's nice to have support from more than just friends or family.. turn towards God! Talk to him.. confide in him .. and I promise you won't regret it ! God works miracles <3